When your child is “melting down,” we tend to wonder why (don’t worry if you can’t pinpoint the reason). Remember that these “tantrums” are forms of stress-release, so here are types of stress our children commonly experience:
- Physical discomfort — hunger, thirst, aches/pain, tiredness
- Physical growth or changes — developmental spurts, body changes, hormones
- Developmental growth — seen or unseen transformation that is in process
- Relationship challenges — with family and friends
- Parents’/caregivers’ moods and stress — our kiddos feel our emotions and stress levels
- Emotions — emotions, while normal, can feel uncomfortable or unsettling, especially if a child hasn’t yet been shown healthy ways to experience and process their feelings
- Demands/expectations — at home, school, or in care settings children are expected to behave in ways that they don’t always have autonomy around
- Change in routine/life — anything that’s new or still not fully integrated into a child’s sense of “normal”
- Sensory overwhelm — too much/little noise, light, movement, touch can overstress a child’s natural resilience
- Mental worries — children, especially when young, can’t always identify or communicate what’s on their minds
- Being “well-behaved” — working diligently to do what they’re told all day long can lead to a build up of stress
Embodying these new understandings takes time, yet it is possible. In the final post of this series, I’ll share behavior shifts you can make to bring this new understanding to life with your child. You’re also welcome to read the first post in this series for ways to reframe your own thinking about “tantrums.”
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