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# Shonnie Lavender Counseling & Coaching

Build, Deepen, & Repair Your Key Relationships

## Sitemaps

- [XML Sitemap](https://www.shonnielavender.com/sitemap.xml): Contains all public & indexable URLs for this website.

## Posts

- [Articles](https://www.shonnielavender.com/resources/articles/) - Peruse the latest articles here, or use the links at the right to browse by topic.
- [The Myth of Happily Ever After](https://www.shonnielavender.com/2025/12/19/the-myth-of-happily-ever-after/) - Bumps in our intimate relationships are normal, but it's easy to forget this. Here are tips for making the hard times easier to weather.
- [Tips for handling your child's "tantrum"](https://www.shonnielavender.com/2025/12/17/tips-for-handling-your-childs-tantrum/) - Effective strategies for responding to toddler "tantrums" with love. Handling "meltdowns" without losing your cool.
- [Why do kids have "tantrums?"](https://www.shonnielavender.com/2025/12/10/why-do-kids-have-tantrums/) - "Tantrums" or "meltdowns" aren't about defiance or manipulation as outdated parenting perspectives argue. Learn why children sometimes flip their lid.
- [Don’t battle your inner critic . . . befriend it](https://www.shonnielavender.com/2025/12/07/dont-battle-your-inner-critic-befriend-it/) - We often wish to silence our inner critics. When we befriend them instead, we may be surprised by what they reveal. Learn how to connect with the inner judge.
- [A new take on tantrums](https://www.shonnielavender.com/2025/12/07/a-new-take-on-tantrums/) - “Tantrums” aren’t something most parents enjoy dealing with. And, many of us have lingering negative effects of how adults reacted to our own childhood “meltdowns.” These unpleasant feelings mean that we often react to “tantrums” in the same unhelpful way that was modeled for us . . . unless we decide to change things. This
- [Listen . . . your relationship will be better off](https://www.shonnielavender.com/2025/12/07/listen-your-relationship-will-be-better-off/) - Listening is one practical skill that’s likely to help improve many relationship problems. Create deeper understanding and openness in your relationship using these three tips.

## Pages

- [Build, Deepen, & Repair Your Key Relationships](https://www.shonnielavender.com/) - Counseling and coaching to help you build, deepen, and repair your key relationships. In person and telehealth therapy for individuals and couples in NC💜
- [Why Parenting Feels So Hard (And What’s Missing)](https://www.shonnielavender.com/parenting-reset/) - Shift parenting from reactive to intentional. Reconnect with the parent you want to be. The Parenting Reset webinar with counselor and coach Shonnie Lavender.
- [Counseling](https://www.shonnielavender.com/counseling/) - Shonnie Lavender is an IFS Level 1 Trained licensed mental health counselor in Asheville, NC. Counseling for individuals and couples. Insurance and private pay.
- [Newsletter](https://www.shonnielavender.com/newsletter/)
- [About Me & You](https://www.shonnielavender.com/about-me-you/) - Asheville IFS Counselor - Parent Coaching - Individual and couples therapy, coaching for parents. - Improve relationships, manage anxiety, reduce conflict.
- [Resources for Growth](https://www.shonnielavender.com/resources/) - Articles, books, videos, and self-study resources for individuals, parents, and couples seeking more connection, harmony, and joy in life and relationships.
- [Parent Coaching](https://www.shonnielavender.com/parent-coaching/) - Shonnie Lavender helps parents of toddlers to teens address behavior, emotions, and parent guilt and shame. - Conscious, non-coercive tools. - Cycle breaking.

## Categories

- [Relationships](https://www.shonnielavender.com/category/relationships/)
- [Parenting](https://www.shonnielavender.com/category/parenting/)
- [Communication](https://www.shonnielavender.com/category/communication/)
- [Love](https://www.shonnielavender.com/category/love/)
- [Emotions](https://www.shonnielavender.com/category/emotions/)
- [IFS](https://www.shonnielavender.com/category/ifs/)
- [Healing](https://www.shonnielavender.com/category/healing/)